Mm

Magistrate
Madge isnt a lesbian.

Malcontent
What you find in your local shopping arcade.

Malediction
Irresistble compulsion to spend all your time in a shopping arcade.

Malinger
A person who hangs around shopping centres.

Malteasers
Jocular traders.

Mambo
Female version of Rambo.

Mammoth
A female moth.

Mandrake
A mythical creature, half man half duck.

Manganese
A condition affecting the leg joints of Japanese comic artists.

Manhattan
A light brown hat worn by men.

Martinet
Australian crash helmet.

Mascarpone
To conceal a small horse.

Mastiff
A group of young men watching a porn film.

Matrimony
How much a wedding costs.

Matrix
Practical jokes executed by your best friend.

Maximum
A very large mother.

Meagre
I'm a little bit cross.

Melancholy
Fruit and veg.

Mericarp
A very happy fish.

Metapsychic
To meet someone who has extraordinary powers of the mind.

Metronome
A garden ornament that frequently travels on the underground.

Metropolis
The London Underground Transport Police.

Miasma
The reason I carry my inhaler.

Midwifery
Half way-through a fart.

Migrate
The speed that a Russian fighter jet travels at.

Minimalist
A piece of paper an anorexic takes to the shopping centre.

Minister
Only moving the teaspoon very slightly.

Minorca
A very small killer whale.

Minotaur
A short excursion.

Minute
My pet amphibian.

Misfit
A very attractive female teacher.

Misled
A toboggan that i own.

Molest
To be most like a mole.

Mollify
To turn into a mole.

Monologue
One single log.

Morass
Extra bottom.

Morose
An excess of a particular vowel.

Mortician
Increased demand for Venetian art.

Mustache
Blimey, that must hurt!

Myspace
The velocity of rodents.

Mystic
A rod of wood that i own.

Mytosis
Your female sibling stepping on your foot.

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